Today’s halfmdog award nominee-Jim Thorpe

22 01 2010

Professional golfer Jim Thorpe was sentenced to one year of prison time due to a failure to pay more that two million dollars in income taxes, and must turn himself in by April 1st.  Thorpe made just under 400k in 2009 in the Champions Tour, which wouldn’t obviously pay off his taxes.  A prison sentence for not paying your taxes, will clearly grant you a haldog nomination.

Voting Friday night thru Monday morning. Awards handed out on Mondays
The halfmanhalfdog team

Today’s halfdog award nominee-Tiger Woods

20 01 2010

Once again, we find Tiger Woods with one of our halfdog award nominations.  According to Benoit Denizet-Lewis, Woods has checked into a sex rehabilitation facility in Mississippi.  Denizet-Lewis, a recovered sex addict, wrote on his blog Monday citing an unknown source that Woods was checked in.  Now we think that Woods getting help is great, and really there is nothing too terribly “halfdog” about this, but who could resist writing this story?  Woods, you get another halfdog nomination.

Voting Friday night thru Monday morning. Awards handed out on Mondays
The halfmanhalfdog team

Don’t Listen to These People Tiger Woods

16 12 2009

Tiger Woods as we all know, has participated in some sinful behavior as of late.  A lot of people have spoken out and given Tiger advice and support, and others have not.  It got me thinking about five people that Tiger shouldn’t get any advice from, and should avoid at all costs.

Ron Artest should be on this list for his track record alone, but yesterday, on his blog, Artest added a little more to that.  Artest called Tiger a “standup guy” and wrote about how he fooled around on his girlfriend and  having a baby with this mistress.  Tiger I don’t think that Artest is the right guy you should go to for advice.

This list in my mind would not be complete if Mike Tyson wasn’t on it.  I don’t think any human on the face of this green earth should take advice from Mike, let alone Tiger Woods.  I don’t know if he has offered any advice to you, but anyone who bites another man’s ear off, tattoos their face, and is a convicted rapist shouldn’t be listened to.

Tiger, don’t listen to Chris Brown.  Brown was given assault charges for beating up Rihanna.  I do not condone violence, and I don’t think you should beat your wife. It would be better Tiger if Chris Brown made contact with you, ignore the call, and do not, I repeat, do not listen to his music.

We all know that Bill Clinton did some amazing things as the president of our country, but when it came to personal life, he was an idiot.  Tiger good job not proclaiming like Clinton, “I did not have relations with that woman”.  I don’t think Clinton would call, I see him more or less creeping you through your bedroom window, so Tiger make sure your blinds are closed at night.

The last person you should not listen to is Marv Albert.  Albert, who commentates NBA games for TNT, assaulted a women and bite her, and was let go from NBC.  Tiger we all hate listening in to Marv Albert calling a game, but just say “NO!” to Marv when he calls and throws down his trademark “YES!”

I think I have given Mr. Woods a few good people to avoid.  Other people that fell short of this list included Kobe Bryant, the Duke lacrosse team, and Rick Patino.  I am pretty sure that you are already ignoring Jesper Parnevick, Tiger just make sure to avoid these others.

Written by: Matthew Flygare
halfmanhalfdog team

Happy Gilmore Revisited

14 12 2009

If you’ve ever seen the movie Happy Gilmore one of your favorite characters has to be Chubbs Peterson.  Chubbs reigns in Happy’s power and teaches him to go to his happy place.  Chubbs himself was destined for greatness until he lost his arm.  Chubbs was at a tournament down in Florida and he hooked his ball in the rough down by the lake and that damn alligator just popped up and cut him down to his prime.  I know when I saw Chubbs with his ridiculous wooden hand I thought there was no way someone could get their hand bitten off by an alligator while they’re out golfing, well I was wrong.  Because it happened at Ocean Creek Golf Course in South Carolina.  A man was leaning over to pick up his ball and the gator pulled him in taking his arm and giving new meaning to the term water hazard.  Don’t worry though, I’m sure his prosthetic will be real sturdy, made of wood probably.

Written by: Jesse Kunz
halfmanhalfdog team


30 11 2009

Tigergate, everywhere you look somebody has a different story of how Tiger was cheating or drunk, or who knows what, but he says that’s not the case at all, and he doesn’t have to tell the public his private matters.  Tiger come on, if you aren’t cheating and you weren’t under the influence, what were you doing?  You say you need some privacy no matter how intrusive some people can be, but just answer this question,  How do you hit a fire hydrant and a tree pulling out of the driveway?  It’s a fair question, you’re an icon and when you get in a car crash at 2 in the morning people are going to want to know what happened.  So, go ahead just tell us, release a statement on your site that says, you were headed to the grocery store to pick up a late night snack.

Nobody really knows what happened to Tiger, except that he hit a tree in his driveway, his wife smashed out the back window of the Escalade with a golf club, and he got some minor cuts and scrapes on his face.  Some people are saying Elin and Tiger were fighting because he’s cheating on her with Rachel Uchitel, but how legitimate is the National Enquirer?  The first thing that came to my mind when the crash happened was that he was driving drunk, but they have said alcohol was not at play, but then who are “they” and who’s to say “they” wouldn’t cover something up for Tiger?

So far in this news, I have heard what didn’t happen, but nobody is saying what did happen, leaving it up to everyone’s imagination.  There are theories out there that he was in a fight with his wife and tried to leave the house, and she started bashing the back window of the Escalade making him swurve into a tree,  which cause Tiger to get upset saying those type of malicious rumors are irresponsible.  At least that is the theory that my grandma likes.

You know what’s irresponsible?  Crashing into a tree at 2 in the morning and then not telling anybody how it happened or why your wife didn’t just open the door to get you out, but instead had to smash out the back window with a golf club.  Tiger if you don’t have anything to hide, tell us what really happened.  Tell us that you did not have sexual relations with that woman.  Tell us you love your wife and family and had to go get diapers at the store, but until then the theories are only going to grow and the rumors are only going to be more malicious.  Tiger the truth shall set you free my friend, that is if the truth isn’t one of those nasty rumors.

Written by: Jesse Kunz
The halfmanhalfdog team

Today’s halfman nominee-Tiger Woods

12 11 2009


Today’s halfman nominee is Tiger Woods.  The people in Australia have been waiting for Tiger to play in their country for 11 years and today at the Australian Masters, Tiger didn’t disappoint by posting a 6 under round of 66.  Familiar territory, Tiger finds himself tied for the lead at the end of day one.  The Australians showed up in full force with a crowd you can’t believe and will get bigger for the rest of the weekend.

Voting Friday night thru Monday morning. Awards handed out on Mondays
The halfmanhalfdog team